Whose wish is it anyway?

It seems to be a fairly universal truth in parenting that a lot of what we do with and for our children is based on our own likes, preferences, and ideals.

Fair enough, you may say. But what about when that's in direct contrast to the preferences and wishes of the emerging personality before us?

Sometimes it's wholly appropriate: brushing his teeth may not figure in my son's top five things to do of a morning or an evening, but Daddy-O and I are pretty clear that it's going to happen every day regardless - and for at least 30 seconds come to that (A* parenting right there).

In other cases, it's less clear-cut. Take our days playing at home or heading to the park. Tibbons will be happily engrossed in one (admittedly repetitive) activity or another and, whatever it may be, I find myself regularly offering alternatives. Be it 'How about the slides?', an offer of the swings (which he hasn't really enjoyed since he was about 14 months) or even 'Shall we play shops instead?'

Let's be honest, these alternative offers are not to expand my son's horizons or because I think it's what he really wants (swings being a case in point), but because I fancy a change.

How about our recent trip to the zoo? We told ourselves we'd decided on it because Tibbons loves animals and we thought it would be right up his street, especially given his growing interest in giraffes.

Yet, when we asked him if he wanted to go, he told us he'd rather 'meet a cow'. So did we go to a farm instead? Erm, no, no we didn't. We decided that sometimes parents know best.

And, in our defence, Tibbons loved it. Almost as much as we did.